Funny Allergy Quotes, Jokes, Stories and a List of Crazy Reactions.

If you're looking for funny allergy quotes, jokes and stories you've come to the right place. I asked my readers from facebook to provide me with their experiences they've had regarding crazy allergy reactions and they did not let me down. They relayed dozens of incidents they've experienced through the years. Over the years I've discovered several funny allergies myself, including allergies to prednisone, diet products and the color red. Some patients have dozens of allergies. My experience is that most of these allergies are not allergies in the physiological sense. The terms "drug allergy", "drug hypersensitivity" and "drug reaction" are often used interchangeably but they are not the same. The science behind them is quite different. This resource from the American Family Physician provides a nice detailed summary of adverse drug reactions.

A detailed allergy history is part of the admitting H&P process. For many hospitals, the nurse or pharmacist obtains the list of allergies from the patient and stores that information in the hospital's patient data base for future reference. Once you're labeled with an "allergy", you will never get that medication or any drug from that class of medication again. In fact, even other classes of drugs must be used with caution with certain listed allergies. For some patients with multiple allergies, this process of detailing an allergy list can be quite ~~time consuming~~ painful. Patients with 20, 30, 40 or more allergies often provide a detailed list of every pharmaceutical, grain, food, animal, smell, and abstract thought that causes any kind of discomfort to their psyche. FBI profiling techniques have confirmed this is limited to women with a dual diagnosis of fibromyalgia. Some of my colleagues in the medical profession have actually coined the term systemic fibromyallergia to define the relationship between fibromyalgia and multiple drug allergies.

For doctors and nurses, having drug allergies that interfere with their ability to provide high quality, evidence based and cost effective medical care can be frustrating. For many patients, they only care about how the drug made them feel and they consider any side effect to be an allergy. Any transient headache or abdominal discomfort or muscle ache will be labeled as an allergy in their mind and forever prevent physicians from providing the right medicine for the right situation. You can see, quite clearly, this problem is rampant in American healthcare. Without further delay, I present to you a list of crazy allergy reactions, quotes, jokes and stories provided by my facebook readers. Whether you laugh or cry, please remember, we are all human, except for the ones that have allergies to every drug known to man, except the one that starts with a d, duh, dililah....

Greater than three medication allergies triggers a psych consult.
She was allergic to the direction East. I love that one.
I was making a joke, put "soap" as an allergy on a homeless patient. Little did I know, you can't delete that, only a strikeout. No delete.
I've had a patient claim a normal saline allergy.
Probably allergic to epinephrine and Benadryl too. She needs a naturopath, STAT!
A nursing student in the class before mine claimed an allergy to normal saline to avoid receiving a shot in class. In order to avoid similar incidents the school directed that we simulate drawing up an injection and insert the needle of an empty syringe into each other, but under no circumstance were we to inject any thing! Believe it or not this idiot passed the course and is now practicing!
"Penicillin, sulfa, dental fillings, and certain radio frequencies".
"Antabuse." Me: What was your reaction? Patient: It would make me crazy sick every time I drank beer!"
My favorite was the patient who had an allergy to Risperdal, Haldol, Cogentin and "all MAOIs" but emphatically denied any and all behavioral health history. He had "been exposed" to these drugs when he was "accidentally thrown in the psych ward because I had the same name as another patient".
Everything for pain "except that D one."
Allergy: Succinylcholine. Reaction: Paralysis.
Tomatoes after 6pm. Seriously.
I had a patient tell me they were allergic to 2mg Dilauded but could take 4mg of Dilauded just fine.
"I can't take any pains meds except that one that starts with a D...what is it? ...dilada? No...dilaudid...ya that's it."
Pitocin: It made her stomach cramp (Im a L&D RN).
Allergic to Benadryl. Reaction: "Fatigue".
Go Lytely caused diarrhea. Not joking. I just nodded and pretended to write it down.
I like it when patients have an allergy to acetaminophen but not to Vicodin. I don't even bother questioning them anymore.
"I'm allergic to ibuprofen. It makes me itchy. I have to take Motrin instead." Three of us had to leave the triage area.
Haldol and Geodon. This is always a red flag for the impending crazy train. There's only one way you know you're allergic to these meds.
Allergic to water. Her doctor told her to only drink soda.
I've had a client who was allergic to water too. They even convinced the doc to order 'distilled water'. Doctor said to fill bottle from the tap after it ran out. This continued for over two years before the client figured it out.
I had a patient tell me he was allergic to "ass-it-am-in-o-fin" (acetaminophen) but that he could take Tylenol just fine!
Everything BUT dilaudid.
Xanax, because it made them pull a gun on a neighbor.
I love the list of -Tylenol, aspirin, Toradol, ibuprofen, Demerol, Percocet, OxyContin, ......Basically everything but the one that starts with "D"......"Dilatin ?"....Then I say, "Dilaudid ?" .....Oh yes ... But it doesn't work in pills.... I need the shot....And Benadryl with it.
Okay had a patient with over 31 allergies and the most frequent funny allergy is when a patient says they're allergic to lasix because it makes them pee.
No surprise but an old favorite: A chronically psychotic patient with allergies to *every* *single* *anti-psychotic* *ever* *made*.
Epi. It made her heart beat fast.
Normal saline. I couldn't believe it when I saw it on the chart. Just had to laugh.
Epinephrine cause cardiac arrest.
I had a patient whose allergies varied depending on what "the barometer in her brain" decided.
Narcan caused nausea and vomiting!
Eggs, then she demanded to speak to a supervisor after dietary wouldn't bring her custard for dessert.
Epinephrine caused tachycardia. No kidding!
I had a patient that was allergic to ice packs. They said when they left it on too long it would turn their skin red. Imagine that!
Horse urine. Don't ask me how they determined this.
Erythromycin: Patient reports it made her vagina swell shut.
A homeless guy came into ER and stated "I'm allergic to that TB shot. It makes my arm swell up."
Oxygen. Not kidding although I don't remember what it caused. Also Neosporin caused Guillian-Barre Syndrome.
Pepperoni. Sure it's an allergy, but after years of the same guy telling me "pepperoni" and me telling him I promise I won't give him any, his tray had, you guessed it, pepperoni. He was pissed. I laughed and then he laughed. I bought him a burger.
Bologne tops the list followed by "everything but dilauda".
Prednisone.
Hamburgers. Not the individual ingredients that make up a hamburger. The hamburger as a whole.
I saw someone with an allergy to "water".
After reading all this post I am happy to realize that we all probably have seen the same patients at one time or another, except for the one that had 54 allergies. Max I have seen is 30.
Niacin: I makes my face flush.
Last week Narcan: It makes the pain worse.
One patient said she was allergic to "all antibiotics." Also, had a patient who thought he might be allergic to lawn mowers. Right after the lawn mower ran over his foot!
Every pain medicine known to man, except for Dilaudid.
I don't understand why anyone would be allergic to Prednisone, and Solumedrol. It's like they just want to just sit there wheezing.
Anaphylactic reaction to Tylenol and NSAIDs with 20 other things while wondering why I can't give her something for her fever and make her heart stop racing. ce packs it is.
Cyclobenzaprine, causes fatigue and dizziness.
Dextrose.
Sodium chloride.
Colostrum!
Oxygen!
Nitroglycerin. Reaction: makes my blood pressure go down.
Narcan. "It makes me crazy."
Rabbit. No lie. We will be sure to NOT serve you the customary Hasenpfeffer for dinner then.
Allergic to high fructose corn syrup (as he sips on soda) and plastic wrap.
I think the most I have seen for one patient was 45, but personally I think I have the worst allergies ever: Onion and hops. So no beer and onion rings for me.
Patient said, "I can't take anything but Dilipidid!"
Silk sutures. He said it caused a scar where his incision was. Really?
Succinylcholine - the patient said that it caused her to stop breathing. Really? The other one was sweat- made her break out in a rash.
Normal saline. I can't make up that stuff!
Chicken! I think he was actually just afraid to tell his wife he hated her chicken.
Lactulose gave them diarrhea and epinephrine makes their heart race. My personal favorite are those allergic to every pain medication but Dilaudid.
Estrogen.
There are actually people who are allergic to hormones. Saw it on discovery medical. A woman suffered from hives, angioedema, and wheezing for years before they finally figured out it was always during her menstrual cycle. They put an estrogen patch on her arm and voila! Hives!
I saw a chart with 23 allergies.
Cabbage, because it causes severe flatulence. This was told to me by an adorable old lady who was dead serious. I had to leave the room.
Two nights ago my patient listed that she is allergic to cocaine. Yes, cocaine.
I b profen that is what they wrote.
Ipecac made him have nausea and vomiting.
I'm allergic to: penicillin, sulfa, potatoes, shellfish, nuts (all anaphylactic); chocolate, mangoes, oil paint, fresh basil (but not dried) and all cats except orange ones. Makes it lots of fun for people to have me over for dinner, or for me to buy processed foods.
I'm allergic to all kinds of foods too! They all cause anaphylaxis. I use epi on a regular basis.
Bubblegum.
A lady in our practice has 54 listed and decided the newest one should be added since she woke up with a headache. Thanks to CPO, I don't have to count, they're listed numerically!
Benadryl and Prednisone.
Dolphins!
Cardboard.
Allergic to morphine, Fentanyl, oxy and hydrocodone, Dilaudid, codeine and Nubain, but "...Demerol works really good!"
I think there could be a number of allergies to craziness ratio. My best guess is any number greater than three! Probably should start a study.
Oxygen. Said it hurt the patient's nose too much and caused a bad burning sensation.
Morphine causes me pain.
Metoprolol because it decreased their heart rate. And my new favorite - potassium, but only IV. They can take the pills just fine!
Oxygen.
I had someone give me a four typed, single spaced pages of drug, food, and environmental allergies. It might have included "air".
Time to apply the "porcelain exam". Otherwise known as .... FOS. (full of ****).
Allergy: Brazilian nuts. NOT Brazil nuts. Brazilian. Looked at MD blankly when asked what her reaction was.
Hair. Her hair was cut short, her skin was very dry with tiny scabbed areas.
"Animals". No specifications. We all laughed every time we saw it.
My mom says she's allergic to 24 meds and won't even take Tylenol! Right! She works herself into an anxiety attack over most meds, but takes her chemo pill without blinking. She ain't right!
My personal favorite: LION DANDER! The conversation went like this... Me: Oh? Um. You said lion dander? Patient: Yep. Me: And how exactly did you find this out? Patient: Dunno. My Momma told me it happened when I was a girl. Me (stifling a laugh): Sooo, um, did you grow up near a lot of wild animals? Patient: Child please. Ain't no jungle animals in the ghetto. Me (... so hard not to laugh!): Ok.. could your mom maybe have meant dandelions? Y'know, like the flower? Patient: No. It was lion dander. I'm sure. She says it makes me all wheezy. Me: Ok.... so Lion Dander it is.
Normal saline flush.
Had a DNI patient allergic to Epinephrine.
My mom, who is an RN, insists that my dad is allergic to epinephrine, because it caused his heart to race and he started sweating and getting shaky. I don't know how many times I've explained to her that is an expected side effect of epinephrine, NOT an allergy. My mom thinks side effects are allergies.
I had a patient who was "allergic" to treadmills and stress tests because his heart was pounding when he had an exercise stress test!
Longest list- 35 "Allergies" including oxygen and saline.
Oxygen. Really?
The tanins in wine!
Weirdest was Dopamine and Narcan.
I had a patient tell me last week she was allergic to potassium. I was dumbfounded for a minute after she said it.
I had a patient who reported she was allergic to oxygen and needles.
Patients chart stated "allergic to ALL pain medications" and listed about 200 meds (no joke). This was a patient referred to home care for "Pain management education".
My cousin is allergic to all narcotic meds. He is so screwed if he is ever in serious pain. All he can takes is Motrin and Tylenol.
Allergic to tap water. No joke!
I'm allergic to chocolate. (Sigh).
I have seen an allergy to NS listed. Might have been a fibro patient.
Here's mine-thank you, immune system-last 2 years at age 40, these all started, which cause hives, angioedema of lips, eyes, and throat-strawberries, eggs, dairy, nitrates, nitrites (no bacon, lunch meat!), aspartame (no fat-free/low-fat/sugar-free stuff), nuts, then there's Flagyl, Lomotil, Droperidol, Bactrim. For now. But, if the egg is cooked in a meatloaf and diluted enough, I can eat it. No butter. Gotta use olive oil. (Just got back from Outback Steakhouse, where I had broccoli that was cooked in butter, so my upper lip is currently swelling, and I just took a dose of epi) Yup. Lovin' my immune system. Good luck giving me meals if I'm ever in the hospital again!
When I worked in the ER there was one who had 32 allergies and at the top of the list was "salazine" aka saline. I about flipped my lid. I felt like telling them that they was just screwed cause there was nothing that could help them.
I've had pateints say they were allergic to heparin because it caused bruising on their stomach. Imagine that.
Cat urine. Craziest one I've heard.
I had a patient tell me they were allergic to Atropine because it made her heart race! Imagine that! I also had one say he was allergic to wheat bread because it made him sleepy!
"Allergic to ALL generic medications". Patient demanded to only get RX's for name brand drugs. They're almost all squirrels Dr. Happy. We just have to figure out which ones are the sick squirrels.
Our medical record doesn't distinguish between adverse reactions, allergies, or side effects. Sleepiness, drowsiness is common for Benadryl.
I'm allergic to hydrogen peroxide and mag sulfate. The nurses never believe me. I get hives for both.
Allergy is orange blossoms?
A few years back I had a prisoner from the State Pen brought in for fever and malaise. Big, ol' useless, fat slob of a guy made Jabba the Hutt look fit. His allergy? Uppers, especially PCP.
Television and snoring.
My patient was allergic to women.
"99% of everything" - really. That's what she said.
Water.
Oh, I forgot normal saline!
Perca...perco....?!?!
32 med "allergies".
Benadryl caused hives.
Epi!
All kinds of soap. It caused a rash.
"Food".
"Smells".
Prednisone allergy. Really?
I actually know someone who claims they're allergic to tap water. I mean seriously?? I'm 99% sure an MD did not diagnose them.
Air and rain.

Join the discussion, insight, humor and general nonsense by "liking my facebook page now! Feel free to add your experience with funny allergies or unusual or seemingly ridiculous reactions in the comments section below. And make sure to check out the hundreds of Happy Hospitalist original nurse and doctor ecard memes on Pinterest.

"I have your allergy list listed as an allergy. And by allergy, I mean it makes me nauseated."