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Ebola Halloween Hazmat Costumes Sell Out: CDC Found Hoarding Them.

Posted by HEALTH FOR ALL

Atlanta, GA --  Hours after Mark Zuckerberg donated $25 million dollars to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) to fight Ebola virus, Amazon sold out of Ebola hazmat costumes and thousands of Halloween shops from Los Angeles to New York confirmed brisk sales for Ebola gear ranging from age 3 months to XXXL.

After telling reporters his agency must 'rethink the way we address Ebola infection control', CDC Director Tom Frieden has confirmed he authorized spending all 25 million dollars on over-the-counter Ebola costumes.

In a news conference yesterday, the CDC proudly announced their well planned protocol to protect healthcare workers using Ebola costumes, describing them as 'full barrier protection gear with a Tyvek suit, eye protection, 2 Surgical masks, 2 Pairs of gloves, booties, Duct tape and plastic bin for easy storage.'

"We want doctors and nurses to be like, 'Damn. love your Ebola gear!" said the reliable source high inside the ranks of the CDC.

Some CDC employees knew a major policy shift was planned days before details were confirmed at the news conference.   Sarah Stenson, a CDC employee laid off yesterday for saying the word 'Ebola' out loud during work, a no-no, confirmed seeing several employees playing with bright yellow Ebola Hazmat outfits that looked identical to the ones she bought her 3 and 8 year-old boys for Halloween.

Ebola Halloween Costumes Seen Helping Hospitals
"My boss asked me last week how to sign up for Amazon Prime and now these Ebola costumes  show up on his desk complete with goggles, air mask, gloves and full body suit.  Coincidence?  I think not."

The CDC has acknowledged a need to better protect hospital workers against Ebola as a second healthcare worker at Texas Presbyterian Hospital tested positive for Ebola virus after caring for Eric Thomas Duncan, the Liberian who has since passed away of this deadly disease.

Rapid response teams within the CDC are now prepared to travel anywhere at a moment's notice to drop off enough Ebola costumes for 14 of the required 21 days of isolation.  However, due to the national shortage in Ebola costumes, the CDC is asking hospitals to recycle the gloves and suits by "turning them inside out' when supplies run low.

"We are also asking hospitals to return their Ebola costumes to CDC headquarters once the coast is clear so we can wash them out and give them to other hospitals that are in dire need of barrier protection," said Mr. Frieden proudly.



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